Where is God when your world is falling apart? In the midst of life’s troubles, disasters, and trauma, we may find it very difficult to see God at work. We may find ourselves asking God, “What are you doing? Why are you allowing this? Where are you when I need you most?” In the midst of our struggles, we may not perceive God’s answers to these questions. Yet, Jesus promised his disciples that he would be with them always (Matthew 28:20). When our lives seem to be going to pieces, will we take Jesus Christ at his word?

As Jesus’ disciples, we want to answer that question with an unequivocal “Yes!”, but in the noise and smoke of life’s battles, we may easily lose sight of Jesus. It’s happened to me and I know I am not alone in that. For decades, Mother Teresa served the poorest of the poor in India. Even as she persevered in this most difficult work, for many years she could not see God in what she was doing, worried that he didn’t want her, and wondered if he even existed. 

Of course my story is very different, but in a recent personal trial, I struggled to see God in what was happening and to understand what God was doing. My youngest brother, in his mid-thirties, was suddenly hospitalized with a mysterious fungal infection of the lungs. Placing him in a coma, ICU doctors scrambled to find a treatment, but over time everything they tried seemed to do more to him than for him. Adding to the strain for my family was the knowledge that my brother had struggled with God his whole life. Had he ever put his trust in Jesus as Savior? I could just see things getting worse. Even as I mobilized people to pray for him, I wondered what God was doing and where he was in this trial. 

Looking to Scripture to see God in our trials

In the Bible, many stories show how people struggled to see God in their difficulties. Two stories in particular, stand out, because God does not appear as a character in either of them. In the book of Ruth, characters speak of the Lord, but he is not seen doing anything directly. The book of Esther does not even mention God at all. But in both of these books, we can plainly see God’s providence at work even if the central characters could not.

Ruth

In the story of Ruth, Naomi and her husband had fled to Moab to escape famine and their sons married Moabite women. Then disaster struck. Naomi’s husband and her two sons all died, leaving Naomi and her childless daughters-in-law destitute and without protection. Feeling abandoned by God, Naomi decided to return to Israel and her husband’s land. One of the daughters-in-law, Ruth, insisted that she would go with her. The women arrived in Israel with nothing. 

Again, God did not appear to do or say anything directly in this book, but his provision and care bursts from the subtext. In Israel, God instituted certain laws and customs for the protection of widows and orphans. A kinsman of Naomi’s husband, named Boaz, understood his responsibility to redeem the land owned by her husband and provide a living for the widows. This would mean marrying Ruth and begetting an heir with her, not an heir of his own, but of Ruth’s late husband (Naomi’s son). None of this was automatic. The redeemer had to volunteer and the one to be redeemed had to be willing. God’s provision for Ruth and Naomi through Boaz was not misplaced. With both humility and boldness, Ruth put herself in the way of Boaz. When he was sure of his right to redeem Ruth, he did not hesitate to marry her, and in so doing provided for Naomi as well. We don’t see God in person in this story, but we see his fingerprints all over what happens. 

Amazingly, Ruth represents God’s providence for us as well. Together, Ruth and Boaz would have a son named Obed, who would be the grandfather of King David, the forefather of Jesus, our redeemer.  

Esther

Like in Ruth, God does not appear as a character in the story of Esther. In fact, God is not mentioned anywhere in the book. Intrigues in the court of the Persian king put all the Jews in Persia in danger of being destroyed. But again, God’s providence permeates this story. Of all the young women brought to him, the Persian king chose the Jewish girl Esther to be his queen. Her guardian, Mordecai, became an official in the king’s household. The two gained favor with the king when Mordecai detected a plot to kill the king and Esther informed the king about it. This favor infuriated Haman, a powerful official in the king’s court, who then conspired to initiate a pogrom to wipe out the Jews in Persia, including Esther and Mordecai. While we do not see God acting directly at all in this story, we see how his favor positioned Esther to intercede for her people in “such a time as this.” In an act of great bravery (for it was death to approach the king unsummoned…even for the queen), Esther went to the king and outmaneuvered Haman, foiling his plan to annihilate the Jews.

Mark

In both Ruth and Esther, we see God’s providence and blessings working for the good of his people in very trying difficulties, even though he does not take a direct role as a character in either story. But there are also stories recorded in the Bible of people failing to see God in their trials when he is literally sitting with them. In the book of Mark, Jesus and his disciples decided to cross the Sea of Galilee after a long day of teaching. As Jesus slept in the stern of the boat, “a furious squall came up, and the waves broke over the boat, so that it was nearly swamped” (Mark 4:37). The disciples—some of whom were fishermen and capable boat handlers—feared for their lives. And even after all that Jesus had done, they still did not seem to really understand who he was: “‘Teacher, don’t you care if we drown?’” Of course Jesus cared and he amazed them with his response to the situation: “He got up, rebuked the wind and said to the waves, ‘Quiet! Be still!’ Then the wind died down and it was completely calm. He said to his disciples, ‘Why are you so afraid? Do you still have no faith?’” (Mark 4:39-40).

Like the disciples, we can easily fail to see that God is indeed with us in our troubles. That certainly describes my perspective when dealing with the crisis of my brother’s illness.

“Never will I leave you”

I prayed for my brother and asked other people to pray for him. At one point, hundreds of people all over the world were praying for my brother. Yet, as bad news followed bad news, I began to give up hope. I worried for my parents who were by his bedside throughout the crisis. Then one morning, I got a call; my youngest brother had died. 

During my preparation to give his eulogy I asked God to show me what I hadn’t yet seen: how God had moved for my brother and our family. I reflected on my mother’s account of his passing: how just before he died, he had come out of the coma. My parents were able to talk to him, and tell him who had visited him, and about the people praying for him. They read to him from the Bible. A little while later, he died peacefully. I realized these quiet moments between his waking and his passing were a gift from God. That gift showed me that God had been with my brother the whole time. As I composed his eulogy, I understood in my heart that God had spoken to my brother in his coma. Even though there was no deathbed profession of faith, I believe that blanket of peace testifies that my brother died knowing that he is a child of God. Like the disciples, I had been too busy bailing out the boat to see that God had been right there all the while, just as he had promised.  

If you cannot see what God is doing when everything is falling apart for you, take Jesus at his word: “Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you” (Hebrews 13:5). In the dark hours of our lives, when we cannot see him, when we do not feel his presence, we can still take great comfort and assurance in Jesus’ final words to his disciples: “And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age” (Matthew 28:20).

To go deeper on learning to see God with you in your trials, check out the Groundwork blogs, episodes, and series listed at the right. We also invite you to download a 28-day devotional e-book from our sister ministry, Today. In Seeking God in Suffering, stories of grief, healing, and community help you see God in the midst of trials.